Reality Shows have come a long way since "The Real World" made us all afraid that one day even more crap like "The Real World" would be on TV. Now television is chock full of shows about assholes being assholes to each other and cake designers making cakes that nobody can eat in order to win prizes. There are so many reality shows out that it's almost hard to think there are any more ideas left, but oh, trust me, there are, and as much as I detest reality shows, there are some that I wish did exist:
"Kim Kardashian Marries A Great White Shark"
It would only be one episode, but what an episode it would be.
"Give Me Back My Face"
Using the process perfected in the hit film "Face/Off," cast members have their faces switched, are anesthetized, have their memories erased, and are each left in a bad part of Seoul, South Korea. They must then put back together the pieces of their life, all while trying to survive the mean streets of one of the most baffling and dangerous cities in the world. Any contestant that doesn't end up sold for sex to a powerful downtown motorcycle gang wins their face back, and a lifetime supply of Nutrasweet.
"Amazing Race... To Old Age"
Four hot, sexy 20 something contestants from diverse yet sexy background are injected with serums that rapidly speed up their aging processes so that they will age from their early 20s to their late 80s over the span of the 4 month season. Meanwhile, the physical challenges get exponentially more brutal each week. Starting with a push up contest the first week, to free climbing a nearly vertical 800 foot cliff while vultures swoop and bite the skin on your back. Whoever survives the cliff climb is given their youth back and a one day guest hosting spot on the hit game show "Family Feud."
"Hoarders: Internal Edition"
Rather than people that keep a bunch of old newspapers in their tiny apartments, this spin off of Hoarders would focus on people who hoard their possesions inside their bodies.
"Growing Up Gottlieb"
This series would focus not on the extravagant mobster world of the Gottis, but on the simple, quiet world of the children of Aaron Gottlieb, the owner of Gottlieb's paper store in Poinchester, Indiana. The third most popular paper and paper goods store in that town. The children all work at the store, and have lots of delightful stories of having to stack paper, organize paper, and make sure no one leaves gum in the water fountain.
"Hot Chicks In A Hot Tub"
The show's premise seems pretty basic at first, it's just a bunch of hot chicks in the skimpiest bikinis currently legal. Until you realize that they aren't allowed to leave the hot tub for the entire season, and there's only enough food in the hot tub for three days. And scattered all around the hot tub are weapons.
"President Obama Bathroom Cam!"
Several cameras have been installed in the bathroom of President Obama, including one inside the toilet. Wait, why I I wish this existed again?
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